I've had enough of this.
Whats the point of me doing this? huh?
Lets just say the truth; ITS USELESS!
Why am I trying to lie to myself?
Trying to cover up the truth with lies?
I'm really tired. (well, you know what I meant.)
Everyday... Trying to put on a smiley face.
Fooling everyone, that I'm fine, when I'm not.

.....Guess what? I began my "smiling lessons".
I learnt to smile, even when the times are hard.
I learnt to smile, even if I really felt like crying.
I learnt to smile, even if.... if everyone isn't smiling.
I'll smile. I just put on this smiley face, and lie to everyone.
Practise smiling in front of the mirror, just to make sure that it's convincing enough.

I want to run till my breath gives out, till I can’t see, can’t feel anymore.
All I could feel is pain.
Just pain. I deserve it. I know.
Suffering in silence, alone.
Only until everything is gone; except the pain...
Only then; only then...
I only want to feel the pain. Nothing else.